The International Cricket Council (ICC) has already had to play a defensive bat at suggestions that Bangladesh should never have been granted test status. It may now find itself fielding questions on Zimbabwe's future at the very top level.

England's mauling of Heath Streak's side at Lord's, by an innings and 92 runs in three days, prompted captain Nasser Hussain to warn his young bowlers not to start believing in fairytales.

What happened, he told them, had been "abnormal". Zimbabwe lost 19 wickets in a day and the increasingly impressive James Anderson, aged 20 and on his debut, took five wickets in the first innings.

Hussain did not specify whether he was discussing the helpful bowling conditions or the opposition's inept display in suggesting that "what happened at Lord's was not Test cricket".

At Chester-le-Street, 16 wickets were to fall in a day -- five, admittedly, were English -- on a blameless surface. Zimbabwe were swept aside for 94 by one of the most inexperienced England pace attacks in cricket history, boasting seven caps and 22 wickets.

The home team, hardly world-beaters themselves despite an injection of promising young talent over the past few seasons, won by an innings again. The last time they had put two such commanding performances together was 18 years previously.

Again, there was to be no fourth day, let alone a fifth.

Seamer Richard Johnson, who took six for 33 in his debut innings, admitted he had been surprised. "That was not a 94-all-out wicket," he said. "You get silly days like that in cricket."

NINE LOSSES

Silly days, though, do nobody much good if they become a habit.

Streak's Zimbabweans have now lost nine Test matches in a row, the second worst losing run in history.

They deserve sympathy, though, after their one world-class batsman, Andy Flower, retired from the international scene in the wake of the World Cup. He was just the last of a string of Zimbabwean players to head abroad in response to political, social and economic uncertainties.

England coach Duncan Fletcher, himself a former Zimbabwean international, voiced that sympathy while echoing the ICC line after the series whitewash.

Asked about Zimbabwe's international stature, he said: "Do you want to spread the game or do you just want to keep it for a few? We have been underdogs before so we know how it feels."

The danger, however, is that even the most one-eyed of spectators will eventually vote with their feet if they are not offered a genuine contest.

Not that there is necessarily an easy solution to the dilemma.

Cricket, understandably, is not likely to relegate any of its 10 Test-playing nations just when it is battling to expand the world game, with Kenya already asking to be allowed to join the top table.

England versus Zimbabwe 2003, however, was not a good advertisement for spectator sport. Or if it was, that sport was certainly not cricket.